I Would Rather Be In Bed

Letting go is hard.

Even when you know deep down that your heart will eventually heal, it’s like taking a deep breath you haven’t felt in years. There’s a lightness that comes with it—the thought of moving forward. Yet, despite that weight lifting, letting go can still feel impossible.

Love is such a beautifully messy thing, isn’t it?

You can love someone with every single bit of your soul. You remember the comfort of their presence—the way their hands look, the feeling of your head resting on their chest, the sense of safety you once felt. But every time you get lost in those sweet memories, you betray yourself to the harder truths. That’s the sneaky power of nostalgia.

And honestly? I think nostalgia is one of the most underrated emotions out there. Sure, therapists recognize how impactful it is, but for the rest of us, we don’t always realize how deeply it can shape our choices. If you had a blissful childhood or fantastic high school years, nostalgia can become a place you visit over and over—sometimes living there longer than you should. But for those whose early years were a little less idyllic, nostalgia might be a source of pain. It might be something you avoid entirely.

Here’s the kicker, though: nostalgia can also trick you into holding onto relationships that no longer serve you.

You might find yourself clinging to the memories of what your relationship once was—the good times, the laughter, the love. You think, If things were great once, maybe we can get back there. It’s like eating your favorite childhood cereal while watching Saturday morning cartoons—those feelings can pull you right back to a time when life seemed simpler.

But the truth is, nostalgia can cloud your judgment. It keeps you waiting, hoping, longing for the golden days of your relationship to return. You tell yourself that if you can just find the right trigger, things will be good again. But sometimes, the damage is too deep. People change, circumstances shift, and that perfect moment might never come back.

And that’s when it’s time to face the hardest truth of all: it’s time to let go.

No matter how much you love someone, no matter how much history you share, you have to love yourself more than the hurt you’re enduring. You have to recognize that staying in a situation that causes you daily pain, no matter how nostalgic you feel, is not worth it. The heart wants what the heart wants, but sometimes the brain has to step in and protect it—like a wise friend shielding you from unnecessary heartbreak.

But let’s be real: no one ever tells you how painful it is to cut ties, to truly accept that the future you’d planned isn’t going to happen. The person you loved, the life you imagined with them, no longer exists. And while your heart aches for the way their hand fit perfectly in yours or the comfort of falling asleep next to them, you can’t lose sight of the bigger picture. You can give it a hundred chances for the sake of nostalgia, but one day you’ll wake up and realize—you deserve better.

Nostalgia is powerful. It can pull you back to restaurants that weren’t all that great but hold memories of post-game celebrations. It can also drag you into relationships that break you down, keeping you stuck in dysfunction long after you’ve outgrown it. Knowing when nostalgia has had its time and when it’s overstayed its welcome is key to protecting your heart and keeping your head above water.

In the end, life will go on—even without that other person. And as painful as it is to let go, you’ll find that you can breathe again. There’s a whole world waiting for you, and this time, you’ll be the one in control of your story.